Viva Las Vegas

Vegas Neon 4
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

As instructed by my loyal Chalkfans, I pointed my car West, and headed for Vegas.

Unfortunately, I lost a pile of cash, however, I had a swinging time.

I did manage to waste hours by the pool, and at least my arctic white skin got its cancerous glow back

Strippers
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

In exchange for the mountains of time and money I threw away at the tables, the hotel kindly gave me a free massage.

So Viva Las Vegas.

Now I'm off to Death Valley !!!

DO YOU SPANK YOUR GIRLFRIEND ???

MoreBetties05
Originally uploaded by JasonLee.

While I was driving down the highway, I was listening to "The Bill O'Reilly Show", and the talkback subject was

"DO YOU SPANK YOUR KIDS ??"

Now that got me thinking about a much more relevant question these days, namely,

"DO YOU SPANK YOUR GIRLFRIEND ???"...or does your boyfriend spank you ?

Well, do you ??

Desert or Vegas ?

Desert action in Death Valley or High Stakes Poker in Las Vegas ?

I can't decide.......

America the Beautiful

Well, I got the fuck out of L.A as quick as I could and headed for the desert. Today I went to Joshua Tree National Park.

Check out these snaps I took:

Cactus Flower
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

The wildflowers are in bloom in Joshua Tree.

Joshua Tree
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

This is a Joshua Tree. There were millions of these. I suppose thats why its called Joshua Tree National Park.

Cactus !
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

This cactus was particularly sharp and pointy.

Big Cactus
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

This was a mighty big cactus. I expect to see lots more as I cruise through the desert.

Ego ? What Ego ??

This is what I want to do:

Chalk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

1. Lush Out
2. Have Sex
3. Have a Good Shit
4. Smoke Pot
5. Go to the Football
6. Lose Weight
7. Watch a Funny Movie
8. Release Tension
9. Hang out by the Pool
10. Touch Smooth Skin
11. Hang Out with My Mates
12. Learn Japanese
13. Laugh
14. Be Cosy

Chalk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

15. Live in New York
16. Go to the Desert
17. Buy Kitchen Knives
18. Shoot an RPG into a mountain of TVs
19. Buy a Canon EOS 20d
20. Eat the Freshest Sea Urchin
21. Write a Book
22. Go For a Swim
23. Drive a Fast Car
24. Go to the Crowny
25. Have a Baby
26. Get Stoned
27. Look at Pretty Women
28. Live in Barcelona

Chalk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

29. Win
30. Get Fit
31. Cut My Nails
32. Make Money
33. Roll Around on the Grass
34. Touch a Giant Redwood
35. Go Snowboarding
36. Learn Photoshop
37. Drink Krug
38. Hang Out with My Mum

Chalk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

39. Smell the Sea
40. Go to the Cricket
41. Take Good Photos
42. Go for a Walk in the Forest
43. Go Back to the Arctic
44. Hang Shit on Poms
45. Read A Gripping Novel
46. Cook Tasty Food
47. Get a Massage (Ive got the best masseur)
48. Learn to Fly a Plane

Chalk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

49. Sleep
50. Dream
51. Learn Spanish
52. Wake Up Refreshed
53. Have Lunch at Pellegrinis
54. Get the Vinegar off my Bag
55. Get Over Jet Lag
56. See Frozen Ocean
57. Be Funny
58. Eat a Lamb Souvlaki
59. Get my Tooth Fixed

Chalk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

60. Go Home

Yes, I am starting to feel a bit like going home. Well, its about fucken time. Ive been away for almost 3 months now, so its one last adventure, then back to Myocum for bongs and barbecues.
And what was that crap about my ego ??

10 Ways to Know You Have Left Japan

Shibuya Crossing Shadows
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

1. Sloppy Service
2. Dirty Tables
3. One Rubbish Bin Only
4. No Smiling
5. No Rules
6. Giant Servings
7. Dirty Clothes
8. Relaxed People
9. Correct Spelling
10. No Crowds

Sayonara Japan

Well, my time in Japan is coming to an end, and boy has it been great fun.

9000 Yen for 40 Minutes
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

I know I havent really been sharing my adventures with you all, as the state of the art LOO CAM HOAX has been kind of taking centre stage, but rest assured, it has been fucken great.

So tomorrow morning I fly to Hong Kong, and then, instead of heading home, I am going back to California.

I am sure to be having a variety of adventures there, and am contemplating cruising off into the desert.

So, let me just say that I am not sorry for commiting the LOO CAM HOAX, and sucked in bad.

See ya.

The Adventures of Mr. Hoax

CLICK HERE NOW
CLICK HERE NOW
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CLICK HERE NOW
CLICK HERE NOW
CLICK HERE NOW
CLICK HERE NOW
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Ultimate LOO CAM

Ultimate LOO CAM
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Well, we have finally hit the ultimate LOO CAM paydirt. After sorting through masses of crappy shots from the state of the art LOO CAM installed in the mens toilets at Kita Junijo station, we have finally come through.

And what an amazing shot it is.

All I can say is, it was worth the wait.

And once again, Mr.Chalk delivers....FUCKING ON THE LOO CAM !!!

Who could ask for more ?

Sapporo By Night

Night Rider - Sapporo 2:30AM
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Had a big night out in Susukino last night. This is the REAL city that never sleeps. Restaurants and bars dont really get rocking till after 2AM.

Messy Girl
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Dont you love girls who get so messed up, their eyes roll into the back of their heads ?

Sapporo Night Taxis
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

More taxis than you could shake a chopstick at

The Big Switch

In order to satisfy the demands of my gay Chalkfans, not to mention the legion of female readers who are constantly demanding a more balanced perspective, I have made the move. The state of the art LOO CAM has been removed from the womens toilet at Kita Junijo, and has been re-installed in the mens.

Mens LOO CAM
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

And as you can see, the first feeds are in !! And before the homophobic ranting begins, let me make it clear that you anonymous closet fags are not fooling anyone. Those who object the loudest are obviously gay themselves.

So take it easy guys. Instead of deluding yourselves, feel free to express your sexuality in whatever way turns you on. I certainly couldnt care less.

Equal Opportunity Blogstar

Hi Everyone

Well, never let it be said that Mr.Chalk is not politically correct. In earlier comments, Gay Boyfriend From New York so correctly pointed out that all of the LOO CAM shots to date have been taken of women. This is because the state-of-the-art LOO CAM has been installed in the ladies toilet at Kita Junijo station, and only women have used that toilet to date.

Its only fair then, that I ask Crazy Japanese Slut to remove the cam from the ladies, and give it to me to install in the Mens.

I will be attending to this immediately, and the next feed will be of men. I hope this satisfies those that are yet to be satisfied.

Love Chalk

A World's First...

LOO CAM 2
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

In what could well be a World's First, Mr.Chalk not only brings to you the latest in LOO CAM technology, now we have, for perhaps the first time on the internet, VOMITING IN THE LOO CAM.

And to all those suspicious doubters out there, just remember that Jesus' resurrection was doubted too. And look how many people believe that to be the gospel truth now.

So, loyal Chalkfans, enjoy your weekend, and rest easy in the knowledge that there is plenty more of this trash to come.

Have a good one !!

This time its for real....LOOOOO CAM !!!

LOO CAM 1
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Well, as usual, The Chalk comes through for his loyal readers, and this time its for real.

With the assistance of my associate, Crazy Japanese Slut, I was able to have my state of the art LOO CAM installed in a toilet at Kita Junijo Station.

And the first feed is in.

So enjoy, chalkfans. And its only going to get better !!

LOO CAM REVISITED

LOO CAM
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Hi Everyone.

Remember this ?

Apparently, one of my brothers friends, who is an avid Chalkfan, was enthusiastically showing his orthodox jewish wife the wonders of Chalkworld for the first time, and what should happen to pop up right in her face....

LOO CAM !!!

Well, while it is true that I deceived everyone by taking a photo off Vice Magazine and pretending it was my own handiwork, I have some great news.

While you have all been sleeping, Mr.Chalk has been WORKING. Yes, working on developing the latest in LOO CAM technology.

Standby for some first class LOO CAM shots. I will be installing my state of the art LOO CAM in toilets around the world, and will be bringing the output direct to you.

So brace yourselves.

Mr.Chalk's LOO CAM is coming to a computer screen near you.....

Badboy Bubby

badboy
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

"You got great tits Flo, one of the seven wonders of the world..."

Anyone else got any favorite bits ??

Pachinko

Pachinko 2
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

My life, my brain, my wallet has been taken hostage by......... PACHINKO !!!

The Japanese gambling phenomenon has seized me in its clutches and wont let go.

Pachinko is an all out, relentless assault on the senses. It puts you in a trance and makes you forget everything.

Pachinko is LOUD, Pachinko is action packed, Pachinko is totally out of control.

I know the odds are absolutely shit, but I dont care. I just want to hear the noise and watch those crazy balls bouncing all over the machine...

Pachinko Detail
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

In the west, we have poker machines, one arm bandits and the like. These are bland, pathetic nonsense.

I wake up, thinking of Pachinko. I walk around all day thinking of Pachinko. Not a moment passes without Pachinko invading my thoughts.

The fact that Pachinko parlours stink of stale tobacco smoke, are lit with blazing white flourescent tubing and are populated with half dead Japanese doesnt bother me in the slightest.

Pachinko Advertisment
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

And hey, I could get all high and mighty, and start going on about the uniquely Japanese cultural experience that is Pachinko, and how it offers a brief glimpse into the Japanese psyche and all that crap, but fuck that for a joke.

The reality is that I want the hyper stimulation, and I want it NOW !!!

GIMME PACHINKO...GIMME, GIMME, GIMME

Sapporo Style (2 degrees)

Sapporo Style (2 degrees)
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Its 2 degrees outside, but that is not going to stand in the way of Sapporo Style.

This one is particularly for Mall Boy, and I had to chase this girl down the street to get it.

It was kind of embarrasing, because my flash went off by mistake.

Her and her friend didn't seem to mind though. They just giggled and kept on walking.

Sapporo Style (Front View)
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Today I am off to the mountains again for a couple of days on the snow, but by Tuesday, I'll be back on the streets, and my camera will be back in action. If there is anything in particular you would like photographed, please let me know.

Have fun while I'm gone....

In Japan

So I got here last night, after quite a mission. 12 hour drive, 11 hour flight, 4 hour flight, 2 hour bus, 1 hour flight, 45 minute train, all in a row. Now I'm jetlagged like a mutherfukka again.

OK, so now I am going to put my shit together, and head out onto the streets for a Japanese picture taking frenzy.

Oh, and I must say, I am feeling a little guilty about all that Mali Cohen crap from last week. Like, I know it was Newhouse who was responsible for all the comments, but I still feel bad.

Sorry Mali. (You probably loved the publicity anyway. In fact, forget it. I'm not sorry. Seeya)

Japanese Adventure

Well, it has been great here in Canada.

From the Arctic to the Rockies it has been absolutely fantastic, but now its time for it all to end.

Hikaru 2
Originally uploaded by Ryou in the box.

But never fear, the Adventures continue and tomorrow, I am OFF TO JAPAN !!!

Not only am I going to Japan, I am going to Sapporo, capital of Japanese sleaze and filth. I will be sure to make my way to Susukino, Sapporo's centre of depravity, and will be taking photos galore.

I hope to get some shots of the Yakuza there, and hopefully they wont chop off any of my fingers.

If I'm lucky, I may even get to see some live bukkake.

Wish me luck...

Wow

Well, that was a popular one wasnt it !! I mean, I know that sex is a popular subject, but I never expected such a wild response.

Ive still got a couple of days left at this ski resort, and Im so busy snowboarding ive got no time for adventures, so till then, i suppose we can just keep this crap going.

Anyone got any other bright ideas ?

Sex in Public Places

One activity that seems to be fascinating to all is the act of having sex in public places.

Have any of you done it before ? What is the most public place you have ever had sex ?

I know a girl that gave a guy a blowjob on a train, and got caught by the ticket man !! Plenty of friends have told me about fucking girls in the toilet at nightclubs, and one friend told me she had sex with a guy on the roundabout in the centre of the town where she lived.

Come on people...tell all

BOOM !!!

One of the things I love about coming to America is American TV. Most of it is absolute crap, but there is always one show that I have never seen before that is totally compelling. This time its a show called BOOM !!!

On this show, they basically get a house and blow the mutherfukka up, then replay it all in slow motion. But before they do that, they pull all the stuff out of the house, and destroy it piece by piece.

Homo Milk
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

On the episode I saw, they smashed up the piano, washing machine and other appliances by rolling 2 ton boulders down a hill into them. They demolished the shed by hoisting an old tractor up with a crane, and swinging it into the side, Then they got the TV and other breakables, and blew em away with big shotguns.

For the grand finale, they filled the main farmhouse with fire bombs and blew the fucker up. They even engineered the explosion so the toilet would blow through the roof.

All I can really say about this show is......BOOM !!!

Don't Believe The Hype

My Phone
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Whenever I get on a plane, I always leave my cell phone on. I leave it on for the whole flight, from before take off until after landing. I have done this well over a hundred times, and not a single crash has resulted. Dont believe the hype.

Truck Mountains

Truck Mountains
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

This photo is my favourite.

Made It

Rockies 2
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Well, I finally made it to Fernie. Now I am done with driving for a bit. Racked up 8000 kms in 8 days. Which is a lot of racking up.

droogz

droogz
Originally uploaded by Mr. Chalk.

Hey Daggy Johnsoon, is this what you were talkin about ?